Forty-five

I tell myself that I’m still alive because I still want to understand, but that’s not true. Understanding is not enough. Philosophers have always tried to understand the world, when the goal is to change it.

Knowledge is not power. Only power is power.

Knowledge I can’t put to use is worse than useless. It’s a constant reminder that I’m powerless.

We used to think the real self was the soul, then the mind, and now the will, der Wille zur Macht. Someone without will power is not real.

I'm still alive because I lack the will power to organize another suicide attempt. Why bother, when I’m not real?