Friday, July 29, 2016

Eighty-eight

But I don’t enjoy talking with Justin, any more than I enjoy talking with Leonard.  

I continue to talk with Justin because he’s learned not to express his racist sexist prejudices when talking with me; but I know he hasn’t changed. 

He feels obligated to talk with me because he knows I have no one else to talk with - no one I enjoy talking with - and I feel obligated to talk with him because he thinks he’s doing me a favor. 

I wouldn’t talk with Leonard if Jennifer, before she left, hadn’t asked me – begged me – to look after her father. 

I just finished writing another letter to Jennifer. She feels obligated to write to me because I’m looking after her father, and I feel obligated to write back.

I can no longer even imagine meeting someone I could respect, and enjoy talking with. I can't imagine that, in the unlikely event I did meet someone I could respect, s/he would enjoy talking with someone as misanthropic as I. 

No comments:

Post a Comment